Esterglamour's Blog

{January 13, 2010}   MENGUCAP SYUKUR

Ke manakah kami mencari
Kasih sejati
Ke manakah kami berseru
Saat badai datang menderu
Yang kami tahu hanya Kau yang mampu
Pulihkan s’gala sesuatu

Kami perlukan keajaibanMu
Kami butuhkan sentuhan tanganMu
Kami tak dapat berjalan sendiri
Kami perlu Kau Tuhan.

Sebuah lagu yang menjadi pegangan saya ketika sedang dalam keadaan terpuruk sekali 😦

Selama ini ketika ada dalam masalah , barulah manusia datang kepada TUhan tapi ketika datang kepada Tuhan , yang diminta hanyalah penyelesaian masalah bukanlah peng-instrospeksian dirinya ..

Itulah sebenarnya yang harus dilakukan , jangan datang dengan hati yang meminta tapi menekan Tuhan , berilah Hati yang berpengharapan hanya Pada bapa .

karena , Tuhan Yesus berkata bahwa , Ketika kau ada dalam masalah dan kau merasa bahwa Aku tidak ada disana yakinlah bahwa Aku disaa , hanya kau saja yang tidak menyadarinya ..

Aku selalu menanti mu untuk datang Kepada KU , Aku selalu menunggu kau memanggil nama KU ,

Terutama saya , setelah apa yang terjadi dengan saya , saya menyadari bahwa saya sering merasa telah melakukan hal yang sangat bodoh sekali , saya telah bebal dan saya telah menyia-nyiakan hidup saya dengan Pria itu . Jujur , saya sangat benci sekali dengan pria itu , saya merasa saya dikhianati, saya merasa dibohongi , dipermainkan, di tarik ulur , dirugikan sekali … dan yang ada dalam hati saya yaitu kesedihan yang mendalam dan perasaan untuk membalasnya , tapi setelah saya mendengar lagu yang diatas dan saya berdoa saya merasa bahwa saya harus mengampuni , saya tidak mau lagii hidup dalam kebencian , saya akan jalan kembali dalam track nya Tuhan yang telah selama ini saya alihkan ..

Saya mengucap syukur ntuk penyertaan Tuhan , dan waktunya Tuhan yang telah membuka mata Saya dan saya yakin bahwa “SAYA PERLU KAU TUHAN” ….

Guys , jangan cari jalan lain ketik kau ada dalam masalah , bilang Pada NYA , KAMI PERLU KAU TUHAN 🙂 pasti kelegaan dan pengharapan ada pada MU ..



{December 19, 2009}   FAITH AND FUTURE

FAITH, the most basic distinction

FAITH is the most basic distinction between one person and another. The entire world stands on one side or the other of the line of faith. There are only two different types of people – not rich and poor, not black and white, not learned and unlearned, not Jew and Greek, not male and female. None of these distinctions really exists in Christ. God sees only believer and unbeliever. “He who believes … will be saved; but he who does not believe will be condemned” (Mark 16:16).

Faith is the new order. Unbelief is the old and dying order. Faith is the dividing line which runs right through mankind. Having faith, or having no faith, are the only alternatives for our approach to life.

Fear sees just what man sees. Faith sees what God sees, and acts upon it. Faith creates action, and people of action, like Caleb and Joshua. Unbelief keeps us tied down in a spiritual wilderness – as Israel was for so many years. Fear and doubt magnify the difficulties, making us think people cannot be won for Christ and that the world is too strong. Without faith, we fear failure and mockery. With faith, people can be won, and so the joy of expectation grips us instead. By faith, we move into God’s fullness.


Banyak sekali yang saya dapat dan saya sangat diberkati sekali oleh Pdt.Reinhard Boonke ini dan paling utama adalah ketika disini dibilang bahwa Iman melihat apa yang Tuhan lihat dan bertindak atasnya , serta Iman menciptakan tindakan nyata seperti apa yang dialami oleh Yosua dan Kaleb .

Kita , saya juga terutama selama ini bertindak atas dasar apa yang KITA pikir , apa yang KITA mau , apa yang KITA ingini saja. Tidak pernah di pertimbangan dahulu . Sedangkan ujung dari segala tindakan kita tidak kita pertimbangkan sama sekali . Sebagai contoh dalam mengambil keputusan dalam segala hal, hubungan , pendidikan , keluarga dll . Sebagai akhirnya ketika keputusan tersebut berdampak buruk bagi kita , kita menjadi DOWN , kepahitan , sehingga membuat segalanya rusak .

Apakah kita sadar kalau selama itu tandanya kita bertindak TIDAK ATAS DASAR IMAN !

Kalau kita beriman , kita pasti menggunakan cara pandang Tuhan dan tidak akan gegabah dalam mengambil keputusan . Seperti yang tertulis dalam ” Siapa yang percaya … akan diselamatkan, tetapi siapa yang tidak percaya akan dihukum” (Markus 16:16) .

kalau kita mau percaya , bertindaklah atas dasar iman kita , dan ketika kita bertindak atas dasar Iman kita itu tandanya Masa depan yang Indah akan ada dalam genggaman KITA !

JLU all 🙂

{December 16, 2009}   BOYS ARE ALWAYS BE BOYS !

If I were a boy
Even just for a day
I’d roll outta bed in the morning
And throw on what I wanted then go
Drink beer with the guys
And chase after girls
I’d kick it with who I wanted
And I’d never get confronted for it.
Cause they’d stick up for me

If I were a boy
I think I could understand
How it feels to love a girl
I swear I’d be a better man.
I’d listen to her
Cause I know how it hurts
When you lose the one you wanted
Cause he’s taken you for granted
And everything you had got destroyed

If I were a boy
I would turn off my phone
Tell everyone it’s broken
So they’d think that I was sleepin’ alone
I’d put myself first
And make the rules as I go
Cause I know that she’d be faithful
Waitin’ for me to come home (to come home)

If I were a boy
I think I could understand
How it feels to love a girl
I swear I’d be a better man.
I’d listen to her
Cause I know how it hurts
When you lose the one you wanted (wanted)
Cause he’s taken you for granted (granted)
And everything you had got destroyed

It’s a little too late for you to come back
Say its just a mistake
Think I’d forgive you like that
If you thought I would wait for you
You thought wrong

But you’re just a boy
You don’t understand
Yeah you don’t understand
How it feels to love a girl someday
You wish you were a better man
You don’t listen to her
You don’t care how it hurts
Until you lose the one you wanted
Cause you’ve taken her for granted
And everything you have got destroyed
But you’re just a boy

What abeautiful and realistic song by Beyonce knowles right?

From this song I learned a lot and many understand that, it was a man’s ego is always using his power alone.
While more women wear their feelings in response to any problem,

I am not underestimate the man, but from what I experienced lately I see what is in that song.

so this is the  story,
I am a woman whose Christian background and I always instilled values that what we sow is what we’ll reap. And with value like that I grow into who never played in any games.

For instance, the companionship, I make friends with anyone, until a point when I was betrayed by my own friends in a way that perhaps it was beyond my expectations, but in fact I still want to be friends with her.
then I think what I have sown until my friend do that, I try to always be  good with her but it is my experience that is required for adults in order to know the different characters of people.

until one day I had a relationship with a man I did not expect to meet and date a man.

Early months are very pleasant,
oh yes, I am also a woman who did not look at the property because my principle is not taken off property. With the simplicity of the man, I pity him. He received me what it is and everything went very smoothly, even until the first 6 months of our relationship going. It’s a lot of obstacles in our relationship, especially from my parents. I had shaky at the beginning and end because we had my parents.

Then we walked and relationships over time I see something different with him. It is the women who came and almost ruined everything. That’s the first, there was a second, third there … I try to stay for all women no real evidence, but his name is also my intuition as a very strong woman. Until finally, he was again with another woman .. I got very sad because he was accompanied by changes that are much with me. I tried to correct myself, what’s with me.

Did I ever made him angry, upset, or uncomfortable with the conditions of our courtship. Then, it was also because the power of the Lord Jesus was very good with me, I worked with those woman(his affair) to catch him cheating and finally revealed all. In that point I really, really can not stand it!

I hurt, hurt like hell! with all the words he is hurting me, with her attitude, with the lies he is very hurt me. Until the end I left him, I end all this.

I am my own introspection, I just really feel that this time his broken heart. because honestly, this man was the first man that I loved, I really love him sincere.

why I can say sincerely, because I want to accept him as it is, and I want to be with him in all circumstances, whether it’s time or happy or  darkest condition in his life though. But I received is all of this,

hummhhh … Initially I was angry at God! but finally I realized that I was wrong. Because with such a principle I can to forget him. I asked myself again, what I had until I reap sow it! But it was a mistake that was not available to me.
But until this moment I can not even blame him, because like the last song he uses only his ego.

As my professor said, that man loves a woman based solely on the materialistic, the intention is like this parable.

Let us compare, where the man who when his wife died and he became a widower, he was not married again, certainly in the intervals short sometimes. They’ll get married again, but we compare it with women, women who have become widows RARELY remarry. Because they are LOYAL to her husband. Is not that right?? In essence, until this moment I cared for him and although all were rewarded with his infidelity. Indeed, he finally apologized at me and I forgive him. And the impact of what he had done was possessive! I became possessive with it. But finally I realized that, it was not necessary. Now I leave everything to God because I know Jesus draft HIM for my beautiful.

Boys, treat your women well and do not ever hurt her because those woman are very valuable. Do not you regret the deed you, and if I became a man I PROMISE will be a good man!


JLU all *sharing my experience

et cetera